Kanga has hit the nail on the head. Thank you for sharing you story I found this most helpful, I've only being seeing my new partner for 6 months but he is the most amazing man I've ever met, and I like just like you oooo I love and I'll fix everything but having joining up with this group and researching I've come to know that yes my partner needs space too and he is ever so grateful for it. I know we will get through this my partner and I,. I'm in a similar situation.
I've been with my partner for 2 and a half years, and the thing i struggle most with is the space he says he needs. We've been doing long distance for almost our whole relationship, and I struggle most with it, especially when he has moods in which he can go days without wanting to talk to me. I find it most hard to not send a message saying 'I hope you're ok xx' or 'I hope you have a good day, I love you' but I often can't keep myself from sending those messages. I'm not sure that the messages themselves are bad, but I hate feeling the way I feel when he has read them and won't reply.
For example, 2 mornings ago we were talking and he was fine, then I sent a message in reply, and he didn't read it. It came to about 8pm of the same day and I sent him a message asking if he was ok, he said no. The following day I made my organised visit to his house. I drove 2. The thing that bothers me most is that we couldn't sleep last night and at about midnight he had a massive group conversation with a few of his friends a group I was added to , yet he can't have a conversation with me either over message or in person??
I'm so confused. When he's good, he's good, but when he's not feeling great, it can be really difficult. I'm unsure of how I can support him when he won't let me, or he pretends he's ok when he's talking to his friends online? It just confuses me so much. I don't know what I do wrong in the way of supporting him. Sign up below for regular emails filled with information, advice and support for you or your loved ones.
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Online forums Before you can post or reply in these forums, please complete your profile Complete your profile. Cancel The title field is required! I've recently started dating a guy and we both really like one another. A few days ago he disclosed that he has depression and anxiety to me. He has been having a bad week and hasn't spoken to me much. We spoke a bit yesterday and he said he is worried that he is taking it out on me by needing space.
I guess I just wanted to know if it's normal to not hear from someone in a low much, and also how to not take it personally. Zeal Champion Alumni. Hey Jaffa, Welcome to the forum! Best wishes, Zeal. Hi Jaffa92 i too have recently been dating a really beautiful man who is also battling Bipolar, when we first dated he told me straight up which I admire him for that. Kitty blueVoices member. Hi Jaffa! Good on you for reaching out for support - I know exactly how you feel.
How to Cope When You're Gay and Lonely - GQ
All the best x. Hi Kitty Thank you for sharing you story I found this most helpful, I've only being seeing my new partner for 6 months but he is the most amazing man I've ever met, and I like just like you oooo I love and I'll fix everything but having joining up with this group and researching I've come to know that yes my partner needs space too and he is ever so grateful for it. I know we will get through this my partner and I, thank you for your story.
Puppies blueVoices member. Hi Jaffa92, I'm in a similar situation.
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Email address. I remember feeling very lonely because no one understood me. At the time, there were no real gay role models except for Graham Norton and Jack from Dawson's Creek —and I certainly didn't identify with him because I wasn't a football player. I had friends but they were all straight and having relationships. This sounds really gross and pervy, but I remember one time we were all hanging out in someone's bedroom and everyone else was making out, doing "couple-y" things. I just sat by myself in front of the TV.
I remember feeling very isolated because I had no one to experience any kind of sexuality with. I felt like I was completely on my own. This carried on until I was 16, when I started going out to gay bars in my hometown. Back then, no one ever asked for an ID. I'd just sit in a corner feeling unbelievably shy and nervy until I'd drunk enough to get up and maybe sit at the bar.
But I felt like I had to do this—I had to go out.
Vasiliy Lomachenko: The Real-Life Diet of the World's Best Pound-for-Pound Boxer
So I'd wait for a guy to approach me, and it would probably end with me going back to his flat to have sex. There would never be much conversation—some of these guys were in their mid-to-late thirties, so what would we talk about? Looking back at it now, I'm like, "What were they thinking? That's not healthy.
I had nothing in common with these men because of the age difference but I was desperate to feel something with someone for a short period of time. I was desperate to feel wanted. A few years later I moved to a bigger city to study.
How to Cope When You're Gay and Lonely
I made myself move because I knew it would force me to meet new people. I thought otherwise I'd end up stuck on my own. But again, I felt isolated because I was living in student accommodation with five straight guys I didn't identity with. So the behaviors I'd already displayed at home just continued in a different city, with much less parental supervision. I made one gay friend, who I'm actually close to now.
But back then, we didn't really talk about things. We didn't really have a proper friendship. We both liked the Spice Girls, and that was enough for me. We'd just go out to bars together and get so drunk that we couldn't remember how we got home. During this time, I had a brief dalliance with bulimia.
Relationship Dynamics around Depression in Gay and Lesbian Couples
All that happened was I would take a lot of laxatives, and then experience a great deal of pain. But I just felt like I needed to feel something, and I needed to feel in control of how lonely I felt.
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For me, alcohol was always the biggest problem.